This post is dedicated to my best friend of 12 years (and counting!), Dona Ann Sophia Welmelaga! <3<3
After about a year of not seeing her, we hung out today and caught up with each other.
All this while, I just took it for granted that the reason why we clicked was because we had so much in common and just were on the same page with almost everything. But today, I realised the main reason.
I’ve always said that the main thing I treasure in a friend is their honesty towards me. That if they don’t like something about me, they’d tell it to my face and not get a bunch of people to ambush me all at once.
It’s how, good or bad, they’d tell it to me personally, not assume stuff and go ratting off something they don’t know for sure about me to others. I really value people whom I can be honest to, and not be afraid of hurting their feelings or offending them for being too straightforward.
And guess what? Ann is EXACTLY that person.
We knew each other since standard 3 when we were 9. We grew up together, went to the same schools together, right up till university, without meaning to. We know both the good and bad in each other.
If I’ve gone chubby, she’d tell me and I’d reply that I know, and yet, she does not scold me or nag at me that I have to lose weight; instead, she recommends remedies and sorts that she thinks might help me lose weight healthily.
If I feel like she’s not paying attention to me when I talk to her (which I have), I’d tell her, and she’d apologise and explain.
If either of us seem to sense that the other seem to be acting differently lately, we’d ask the other, and we’d explain.
TRUTHFULLY, mind you.
I think that’s the most important thing in any friendship or relationship; HONESTY.
When someone is honest to you about how you feel, at least you’ll know that hey, maybe at certain topics, you have to go about a different approach. And I don’t mean that in a bad way because hey, everyone takes stuff differently.
If you don’t tell someone what’s wrong, how is the other person gonna know what they did wrong in the first place? What, you want them to keep guessing until they get it right?
What then? Are you gonna pretend that nothing is wrong and deny that you’re not happy with the other person because you’re afraid the other person might take it the wrong way?
Yes, some people might.
But then, you’ll find out who exactly you can open up and be yourself to, right?
I’ll let that sink in for y’all.