Here’s the thing about TRUST: It’s so delicate, so… sacred, that once broken, it will never be the same.
Well, to me, at least.
I’ve always had issues with trust, I’ll admit. But I’ve never really been distrusting towards anyone until later on in my life, around the second year of university.
The way I work is this: When I meet someone, I’ll give them some form of trust. This trust can expand or dissolve completely, depending on how we get along. Usually before that trust can completely dissolve, both that person and I probably haven’t been regularly keeping in touch anyway.
Today (not literally today) though, I am very cautious with the amount of trust I give someone. Now, if someone wants me to trust them, they have to earn that trust.
I’ve come across too many people who have misused that trust in the past 3-4 years, that my perception has changed completely.
Most commonly, I find that people of higher rank tend to be very doubtful of the statements of the people of lower rank than they are. tch Like when something goes wrong, the more ‘famous’ of people (could you call it being ‘famous’, though? =/ ) will automatically assume the people below them to have done that wrong.
I have come across bosses that think just because they’re the boss, they can push people around and push the blame to their minions. I’ve had bosses who shoots at their employees before they even have a chance to explain themselves; and some never even get the chance to, and are falsely accused. There are also those who spread untrue rumours to others, just from what they see, and not what they know.
I would know. I spent some months in one of those situations; my self esteem dropped rapidly, and I was never happy going to work. When I finally couldn’t stand it anymore, I left.
Best decision of my life.
So I think I can claim, therefore, that I’m enormously lucky to have someone like my current boss.
He trusts me completely with the work he gives me. Of course, like everyone else, there are bound to be times where I mess up. And my boss WILL call me out on it, face to face, without announcing it to the world.
When there’s some little hiccup or mishap and he asks me if I had a part in it, and if I say no, he will leave it at that and completely take my word for it, without questioning me a million times ‘if I was sure I didn’t do it’. (That’s one of my major pet peeves, aside from being a grammar nazi. I always feel like shouting, “I KNOW I’M NOT EXACTLY THE BRIGHTEST APPLE IN THE TREE, BUT I KNOW THE DIFFERENCE BETWEEN ‘I DID‘ AND ‘I DID NOT‘, DAMMIT!”)
Truth be told, I was quite shocked when my boss showed me that must trust. It is so rare nowadays that my brain felt a little hazy (in disbelief) afterwards.
After that of course, I felt grateful. And I’ve tried my best not to disappoint him. It makes me crave to do even better, to make my boss proud because he trusted me when normally, no one would.
That’s how much power trust (and a little positive encouragement) can have on someone.
Unfortunately, not many believe in that same theory.