The Importance & Effect of ‘Trust’.

Here’s the thing about TRUST: It’s so delicate, so… sacred, that once broken, it will never be the same.

Well, to me, at least.

 

I’ve always had issues with trust, I’ll admit. But I’ve never really been distrusting towards anyone until later on in my life, around the second year of university.

The way I work is this: When I meet someone, I’ll give them some form of trust. This trust can expand or dissolve completely, depending on how we get along. Usually before that trust can completely dissolve, both that person and I probably haven’t been regularly keeping in touch anyway.

Today (not literally today) though, I am very cautious with the amount of trust I give someone. Now, if someone wants me to trust them, they have to earn that trust.

I’ve come across too many people who have misused that trust in the past 3-4 years, that my perception has changed completely.

 

Most commonly, I find that people of higher rank tend to be very doubtful of the statements of the people of lower rank than they are. tch  Like when something goes wrong, the more ‘famous’ of people (could you call it being ‘famous’, though? =/ ) will automatically assume the people below them to have done that wrong.

I have come across bosses that think just because they’re the boss, they can push people around and push the blame to their minions. I’ve had bosses who shoots at their employees before they even have a chance to explain themselves; and some never even get the chance to, and are falsely accused. There are also those who spread untrue rumours to others, just from what they see, and not what they know.

 

I would know. I spent some months in one of those situations; my self esteem dropped rapidly, and I was never happy going to work. When I finally couldn’t stand it anymore, I left.

Best decision of my life.

 

So I think I can claim, therefore, that I’m enormously lucky to have someone like my current boss.

He trusts me completely with the work he gives me. Of course, like everyone else, there are bound to be times where I mess up. And my boss WILL call me out on it, face to face, without announcing it to the world.

When there’s some little hiccup or mishap and he asks me if I had a part in it, and if I say no, he will leave it at that and completely take my word for it, without questioning me a million times ‘if I was sure I didn’t do it’. (That’s one of my major pet peeves, aside from being a grammar nazi. I always feel like shouting, “I KNOW I’M NOT EXACTLY THE BRIGHTEST APPLE IN THE TREE, BUT I KNOW THE DIFFERENCE BETWEEN ‘I DID‘ AND ‘I DID NOT‘, DAMMIT!”)

Truth be told, I was quite shocked when my boss showed me that must trust. It is so rare nowadays that my brain felt a little hazy (in disbelief) afterwards.

After that of course, I felt grateful. And I’ve tried my best not to disappoint him. It makes me crave to do even better, to make my boss proud because he trusted me when normally, no one would.

 

 

That’s how much power trust (and a little positive encouragement) can have on someone.

Unfortunately, not many believe in that same theory.

 

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10 comments / Add your comment below

  1. Trust, it’s such a strong and sensitive topic. Personally I’m a pretty open person and tell others things, but I have limits and know that certain things can’t be shared or at least not be shared with that particular person.

    I’m pretty careful when sharing things with others. I’ve never experienced anything mistrust really but I just know that it can happen anytime.

    In terms of trust in the work place…it’s so important. If the management levels don’t trust the employees then employees will just feel unworthy, unmotivated and will probably leave. If there’s trust, then employees will feel valued therefore motivated to contribute and will be put in that little bit of extra effort.

  2. When it comes to work places and superiors putting the blame on the minions (as you call them), I think it is less of a trust issue and often times is more about actually thinking they are superior in intelligence and importance, and thus, they will put the blame on others (especially those beneath them), if need be.

    Once trust is broken and once you are exposed to too many untrustworthy people, it makes sense that you will have trust issues.

    When it comes to trust, I am not very trusting of people, which is something I probably should work on.. I am normally suspicious of people until they have proven themselves, and I still don’t know if I trust anyone completely.

    I agree, though, that positive encouragement can go a long way. It is nice to hear that you your boss has provided you with such a positive environment.

  3. Your new boss sounds wonderful. I tend to trust quite easily, though I have grown more cautious over the years. I feel like my trust is kind of a slow-burn thing. So you start off with a certain measure, and the more I feel I know you, the more you get.

    Take care! xx

  4. Bad bosses are terrible. There’s a principle in business management called the self fulfilling prophecy, and it’s exactly what it sounds like. A manager has an expectation (for example, they expect an employee to fail) and so that dictates how they treat the employee (if they expect the employee to fail they might be double/triple checking working, micromanaging, etc) and that impacts how the employee feels (personally it would make me feel awful) and that dictates how the employee performs (if a manager makes me feel awful I’m not going to be giving them my best efforts and I’m more likely to fail). It sounds like you have a much better boss now though, which is great! http://sparkly.iceglow.net/wp-content/plugins/wp-monalisa/icons/wpml_yahoo.gif

    1. TELL me about it.. >< Yeah, I learned about self-fulfilling prophecy in uni a few years ago. xD I'm glad I'm not the only one who thinks that way! Then again, I think we have to go through the bad ones to fully appreciate the good ones when they come, no? ;)

      1. In a perfect world there would be no bad bosses to deal with lol but I completely agree that bad bosses give us a greater appreciation of the good ones. I think (read: hope) having experiences with bad bosses also helped me be a good boss when I was one http://sparkly.iceglow.net/wp-content/plugins/wp-monalisa/icons/wpml_good.gif

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