So I just finished reading Andrew Matthews’ How Life Works, and a lot of it covered being happy and loving yourself and being kind to yourself first to attract the ‘good vibes’, I guess you could say.
And well, it’s no secret that I have been battling self-image issues forever (since junior high actually, but eh same thing). And I’ve done the Gratitude Jar here on my blog throughout last year to help with my positive thinking.
But what was quite scary was, after all my efforts to live a more positive life (which worked, by the way, in case you were wondering), I managed to fall back into the depression pit somewhere last month after what seemed to be a meager incident.
After reading Andrew’s book and taking it into consideration, I’ve decided to do as he says. That is to say, in order to change the way you feel about something (eg attract more positive ‘vibes’), you must first start with loving yourself. Don’t criticize yourself, don’t look down on yourself, and give yourself a break.
Yes, it’s so simple and common, but it’s easier said than done, and I admit it’s especially hard for me.
So what am I going to do?
I’m gonna write at least one incident of the day here, every day, a reason why I should love me. I plan to upkeep this for a year at least, and the reason why I’m starting now instead of just waiting for next year to begin is because I want a change NOW. I don’t want to wait for my life to change (God knows I know I’m worth more than life is throwing at me), so I’m taking action now.
– I spread the positive vibes. I encouraged my grandmother to think positively of the current situation. She’s already upset as it is.
– I tried my best not to over-think the SA situation.
– I have to teach at work again tomorrow, but I tried my best to live in the now and not think of it negatively. Tomorrow will turn out just fine. =)
– I gave encouragement and praise to the kids in class when it was due.
– Realised that I was angling towards some negative thoughts on a few occasions in the day, but caught myself in time and turned the thought around.
– Tried SO HARD to attract positive vibes. To the point where, as said in Andrew Matthews’ book, I think I got a bit desperate instead of wanting it. And I think I probably tried too hard. >< But the point is, at least I know what I really want now. And I know that I am capable of great things when I really want them. =)
– I never lost hope. =) I’ve realized what a tough thing thinking positive can be, especially when you want something so badly. Yet I had been patient; although the day seemed long and daunting, I still tried to keep as positive as I could, and never lost faith.
– While observing in class as usual, Lika asked me to take over the class because Alice was having some problem with her back. I think I handled it pretty well. For that, I deserve a pat on the back. ^^
– Bought the stuff. I should be proud of my big heart, and not think of it as a disadvantage. Having a big heart is never a disadvantage. =)
– Today’s entry will be a wee bit different. Because I didn’t have to remind myself why I’m awesome at all. Stewart made it more than clear, and on more than one occasion. Thank you. You have no idea what it means to me.
I know I haven’t posted an entry here in almost a month. A lot has been going on, and to be completely honest, I wasn’t up to doing much other than doing the things I’m obliged to do. Anyhow, I’ve decided to start again right when I’m sort of at one of my lowest; the time when I need some me positivity.
Also, I’ve decided to write some of my posts in a third person.
– So today, I’m rather proud of my level of concentration at work. Sure, I did feel like dozing off and I did go on other websites and all, but overall, I was pretty productive. Good job, Krystle! *self hug*
– It was very compassionate of you to comfort U today and make sure she was okay. That has always been one of your stronger characteristics; you care for others a lot. And it’s not a bad thing, honey. <3 Never stop being caring and compassionate and helpful. Not everyone may appreciate it, but the ones who matter will, and that’s all you need. You can’t please everyone, yet you know first hand how a simple gesture or word can make or break a person’s day. Be the person you want to see more of. You’re doing a good job, Krystle. <3
Consistency is not my friend, apparently. So maybe posting every day was a little… well, unrealistic. But I will follow through until the end of the year.
So today I was told at work that I’ll be handling the class with Jane. I somehow had a strong feeling the day before that I would be asked to take the class this week, and voila; it was the very next day. It is no secret in the office, I think, that I don’t like taking the classes. At all. This time around though, I think I handled the news (that I have to take the class) pretty well.
Well, I reacted differently to it compared to last time, that’s for sure.
Kudos to positive thinking! ;)